Alabama

A  group of  Alabama  friends  went deer  hunting and  paired off in twos for the day.  That night, one of the  hunters (Tommy) returned  alone, staggering under the weight of an  eight-point buck. "Where's  Henry?" the others asked.
"Henry  had a stroke of some kind.  He's a couple  of miles back up the trail," the successful  hunter replied.
"You  left Henry laying out there and carried the deer  back?" they inquired.
"A  tough call," nodded the hunter.  "But I  figured no one is going to steal  Henry!"
  
Georgia

The  owner of a golf course  in  Georgia  was  confused about  paying an  invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for  some mathematical help. He  called her into his office and said, "You  graduated from the  University   of Georgia and  I nee d some help.  If I were to give you  $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take  off?"
The  secretary thought a moment, and then replied,  "Everything but my earrings."

Louisiana

A senior in Louisiana was overheard saying ... "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana  . "When  asked why, he replied,  "I'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world."

Mississippi

The  young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy,  "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!" Bubba  replied, "Did you see who it  was?"
The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."

South Carolina

A man in South Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it.  Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back.  He asked the fellow what the problem was.
The man replied, "I have a flat tire."
The passerby asked,  "But what's with the  flowers?"
The man responded,  "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back.  I  never did understand it neither."

Tennessee

A Tennessee State Trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65.  The trooper asked,  "Got any ID?" The  driver replied, "Bout whut?"

Texas

The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading trash from his pick-up into the ditch.
The Sheriff asked, "Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch?  Don't you see that sign right over your  head."
"Yep", he replied. "That's why I dumpin it here, cause it says:  'Fine For Dumping Garbage'."

You  can say what you want about the  South, But  you never hear of anyone retiring and moving  North.

The Politically Incorrect Guide to the South (and Why It Will Rise Again)
The Mind of the South
1001 Things Everyone Should Know About The South
South Was Right!, The